Monday, November 29, 2010
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Abigail was so sick last week. She would go to bed with a normal temp and wake up with a hollusanation(sp) and a temp of 104. One night she woke up and began yelling at me telling me, "DADDY DIDNT DIE! HE LEFT US! DOESNT HE LOVE ME! TELL HIM TO COME BACK! I HATE THAT HES GONE!" I tried to calm her down. Get her to wake up so I could talk to her. I finally just started reminding her that daddy didnt choose to leave us God took him home to Heaven, Daddy does Love you that was the last thing he told me on the phone. And that Daddy cant come back once you go to heaven you cant come back. then all of a sudden (i didnt even know she knew some of these words) she starts yelling again "I DONT BELIEVE YOU MOMMY! DADDY LEFT! HE HATES ME! WHY HE NO LOVE ME! WHY HE NOT HERE ANYMORE! TELL HIM COME BACK I WANT HIS HUGS NOT YOURS! DADDY DIDNT DIE! HE JUST LEFT! TELL HIM COME HOME!" I started talking to her again. And Something finally clicked i dont know if she woke up some and relized what was going on or what but she crawled over to me and hugged me tight. I then asked her if she remembered that daddy was dead she said "yes mommy he died car accident, roll over." I let out the biggest sigh of relief that she did remeber.
My little princess is turning into a little I dont know what to call her. She has really begun to be disobediant. She used to listen so well and I never had to get on to her much. But now it seems every time I turn around I have to get on to her again and again about the same thing. She doesnt seem like she is learning her lesson. No matter what I try she just keeps yelling and screaming and telling me NO!! This has been the time now where I wish I had my "back up" (Luke). I am trying to find the best way to help teach her but nothing I try seems to work she turns around 2 mins later and does the exact same thing.
Monday, November 1, 2010
The viewing for little Donald is tomorrow evening. I will be there to help Norma as much as I can. I told her ahead of time that I will TRY to be there as long as she wants me to be but really cant make any promises as I am personally still dealing with grief and just the thought of seeing someone I know in a casket is driving me crazy. I am praying the Lord will give me the strength to make it though.
Friday my friends 5 year old son died. I visited the church they attend on Sunday night and had a flashback of the sunday after Lukes accident. The testimonies, the memories, the songs, the message. Oh how it all reminded me so much of that Sunday. But you know what it has been a great help for me. I am getting to help Norma in a diffrent way than anyone else has been able to because I have experience death in our family. Even though lossing a spouse and lossing a child is completly opposite. I could not imagine lossing Abigail or Andrew, Norma said she could not imagine lossing her husband. But in our so diffent losses the Lord is giving us a special bond in Him.